the story of bob weber

i am sitting in angel falls. downloading music... not music for me... music for sarah. she got the new limited edition u2 iPod for christmas, and with that, the entire u2 collection... 447 songs. i am trying to understand... the iPod came in the mail and the excitement was so intense that she had to start the downloading. well, the time that sarah had available to download this said music spanned less time than the tracks require to be downloaded. so, here i sit, keeping the computer company as the songs file in. the current song is 164... i have been here by myself for just over an hour. we were here for 2 hours before sarah left. i am estimating about 3 more hours before it is all over. sigh.

enough to make sitting here for hours on end, doing next to nothing, completely worth while, the random man in the red plad shirt. i was sitting here, the coffee house was full, and a friendly looking 40ish gentleman with gray curly hair, bright eyes, and a warm smile sat down at the end of my table. this was just fine, i dont mind sharing my space. he pulled out his iBook and we both sat contently, not talking.

i was listening to travis on the iPod, then sarah came back in to drop off some stuff for me before she went off to work. so, i took out my ear buds, and chatted with her for a brief moment. just after sarah left, bob weber (the above mentioned gentleman) turned to me with a smile and said, "is that the new The Cure cd?" as he nodded towards a stack of my cds. being the friendly person that i am, i smiled and said, "yep, it is. it is really good too. if you want, you can go ahead and listen to it." he asked if he could download it (which i am generally very much opposed to, but for reasons i am not really sure of, i told him to go ahead). so we sat here chatting, about the cure, the new u2 iPod sitting next to me, and other random musical subjects. he asked if i like rem, i said yes, that i had just bought the new cd. so we chatted up about rem... i think he was trying to determine if i knew what i was really talking about, or if i was a poser. i must have proved myself worthy, because he divulged personal information. he works for rem... tours with them... hangs out with them... friends with michael stipe. (honestly, i thought... you have got to be kidding me... do you actually think that i am going to sit here and actually believe what is coming out of your mouth). so i humored him... or so i thought. then one of the owners of this here coffee joint walked over and said, "hey bob, when are you going on tour." holy shit!

i almost peed. i am not kidding. this was all internal mind you, i was externally very calm and composed. so bob and i kept talking. he has worked with rem since 1989. this has allowed him to get to know folks like pete yorn, joseph arthur (who is touring with rem in europe this winter), and wilco (yes, we are talking jeff tweedy and john stirrett, wilco, my favorite band, wilco!). when he asked if i was familiar with wilco, prior to talking about his having worked with them, i gushed... it went something like, "oh yeah, totally my favorite band, no contest." he seemed amused by my response, talked a bit about working with them. i said i had just bought tickets to their show yesterday, that i am super excited. his eyes shown and he smiled, "really, well, jason, the guy that runs the boards for wilco, is one of my best friends. what is your name?" i told him... he picked up his phone... pushed a few buttons, and jason was on the other end. it went something like this, "hey jason, this is bob, i am sitting here with a friend of mine that is going wilco when they are here in cleveland. her name is colleen, i told her to catch up with you at the show. i want you to give her and her friends vip treatment. she is a cool girl." FREAKING OUT! then bob and jason chatted for a minute or two about something completely unrelated to me, he hung up the phone and smiled. no joke, i could have kissed the man. i got excited like a little kid... i am sure that i should probably be embarrassed for myself, but bob seemed to love my response.

if this all really comes to pass, i am going to designate every december 29th for the rest of my life to being "Bob Weber Day." i am so excited that i can hardly contain myself. oh sweet joy. beautiful things like this make my life amazing. it is only #201... i have hours left... it is all worthwhile.

WILCO

i love this band. every time that i listen to them, i love them more. jeff tweedy is incredible, possibly one of the most beautiful people i have incountered. the lyrical depth astounds me, and the skill used musically and in recording is amazing.

if you are not familiar with wilco. you need to become so. your life will be left sadly incomplete without them.

it warms my heart. 

the beauty that is jeff tweedy

i go through phases

when i look at my life, it sometimes appears as a constant circle of recurring patterns. since i was... lets say 13... my life has been repeating itself constantly. though the circumstances and characters vary, the mental and emotional states are nearly identical. why... what is this about... does the rest of the world suffer from a similar problem?

why, you may wonder, am i thinking about this... i was thinking about certain things that i am incredibly bad at. case in point: calling people back. i am terrible at calling people back. the thing that frustrates me is that the issue isnt that i dont want to talk to the person, most times some of my best friend suffer at the end of this problem. these are the people that matter to me most, and so often i get so cought up in my own life that i never stop to remember or even think, 'hey, i really need to call this person.' days like today, i sit and ponder my issues, become frustrated with myself, and then resolve myself to address the problem. make it a point to be better about keeping in touch with certain individuals. for several weeks, or even a couple of months, i will do better. then, before i know it, it will occur to me that so and so has called me 4 times in the last week and i havent called them back. AHHH! i hate this about myself. i am sorry. i am a terrible friend at times, i know.

the phase thing is true in other areas too. smoking... major issue. i will quit for a month, 4 months, 2 days, however long, but always, it beats me. really, i beat me. my mind isnt strong enough or something... i dont know. but it frustrates me to no end. i decided last night that i need to stop smoking. so, i havent smoked all day, but i know, for a fact, that i am not going to be able to quit smoking if i am still working at alcon. it is my sanity. sad, i know.

why is this post such a ramble, i dont know, but i felt like talking. there was no one around, so i typed. all of you people out there who i have not been calling back, i am sorry. i love you. dont loose heart, someday, i will really do better.

angel falls

there is this little coffee shop 3 blocks from my apartment. i love it. though it pales in comparison to donkey, it is beautiful. it is not the perfect oasis that is drawn up in my mind, but it is an amazing coffee haven. my roomate feels likes she's in a living room. its a good thing, she says. the esspresso beverages are superb. the coffee is decent. the atmosphere is unbeatable. best of all... wireless internet... for free. now can you beat that?

Hello, friends, this is Sarah. Hope that you weren't enjoying hearing from Colleen too much, because I am taking over. That's right, I run this show. Get it straight. We use capital letters in all the right places around here. If you don't like it, than be on your way. This blog isn't for the fainthearted. So...um, now that I've said all my smacktalk, there really isn't a whole lot left. Oh, yeah, there is this: Mae and Lindsey, I really like you a lot and I've never even met you. Mae, you have a beautiful voice, and Lindsey, congrats on the hedgehog. Great talking to you. Ok.

did you know that i love my roomate? i am not sure if i have said it lately, or on here at all, but i know. she is great... so many things that i could say... i will be brief. she makes me smile... all the time... i am not kidding. i dont remember a time in my life when i have felt such pure laughter like joy because of another person. she is an amazing roomate... we balance eachother out in a way that i cant even discribe (we are so incredibly different that it baffels me sometimes). she makes me feel good about myself... this is such a huge gift in a friendship. the positive reenforcement she sends in my direction is almost contant. it makes me feel good. alright... too much... i am done now.

Merry Christmas!

a merry christmas and happy holidays to one and all! i hope that you have been having an enjoyable day. i love christmas. presents are always nice, but i dont think that the gifts have much to do with it. spending time with my family is often incredibly stressful for me, but for reasons i cant explain, that all fades away on this one day of the year. i wake up in the morning, feeling just like a little kid. this is something that i always thought that i would outgrow, that over time, as i matured, christmas would become much less exciting for me. this morning i was watching my mom open a gift and the glee on her face was classic... just like that of a little child and i realized that christmas isnt just for little kids. maybe our society trys to make youthful excitement something that is appropriate for only small children, but my mom is 51 and she lives her life more like a child than many of the children that i see today. i watched her, hoping that when i reach her age, i will still have the heart and joy of a small child. it really is a beautiful thing.

okay, sorry, enough of the sentiment. for those of you avid readers out there, i am sorry for the recent lack of blogging on my part. as is typical, i have been excessively busy, and time has not afforded me this luxury. super exciting for me! i got a laptop for christmas! arent you happy inside?! i am happy inside... you should be too. it really is quite fun.

side note: since i got a laptop, i didnt so much get any other gifts (i am not complaining, just stating), so i got to watch my mom, dad, and sister open their gifts. in the past, it might have bothered me to just sit and watch other people open presents while i opened none, but i really enjoyed it. somehow, i like giving gifts and watching other peoples enjoyment of them, almost or just as much as receiving gifts. it really is an amazing thing, gift giving... great fun. i also enjoy when moms get the gifts that they get for their kids mixed up... example: i asked for a book (it was on my christmas list... we do those in my family) called, The Greatest Stories Never Told. she opened it, and kinda made a funny face (not my sisters kind of reading) and said, "whats this?" i giggled and said, "hey, that was on my christmas list." my mom smiled sheepishly and said, "oops... sometimes i get mixed up... give that to your sister." hehe... it was funny... i love my mom.

well, now that i have succeeded in being completely random, and i am sure intirely unenjoyable, i am going to be running along. merry christmas everyone!

holiday madness...

why does the whole world find it necessary to wait until the last minute to do their christmas shopping? i have my ocasional issues with procrastination... i do understand... but really... the whole world. i may not have such issues with this, except my whole life is disturbed by the fact that it takes me twice as long to get myself anywhere (that is avoiding places such as the mall too). driving in conditions such as these causes me to say fuck far to frequently and to smoke intirely to many cigarettes. yes, not healthy. it is times like these that i dislike living in the city... what ever happened to the nice country roads that i go a smooth 70 and all i ever had to worry about were the mass amounts of deer?

my point... i screeched my tires this morning. it was amazing... driving down market st... at an already frustrating 30mph... a white chrysler mini van pulled out of the turning lane, right in front of me! what the hell! was there room between myself and the car in front of me... no! my response, apply moderate pressure to the breaks and release an expletive. then suddenly (mind you the car in front of me was moving before the white van cut me off) the white van moved its little ass out of my way, and i realized the beige mini van that had been steadily moving in front of me... was stopped! with my cat like reflexes, i slammed on the breaks, the tires began to squeal and my jeep continued to move. wow... it was in a strange way, quite a rush. i didnt hit the beige mini van... sigh of relief. then, slightly amused by the whole thing, i glanced in my rear-view mirror as i started to drive on and i saw the dual skid marks that were nearly 50 yards long. i dont know what came over me, but i began to laugh uncontrollably. well, the man in the beige mini van didnt seem to like that i had nearly rear ended him. i laughed, he glared, flicked me the bird, and i laughed even harder. oh what fun it was.

praise jesus, my jeep has been returned to me! as you may know, i was driving the red, automatic, full door, 2003 jeep, rather than my maroon, manual, half door, 1998 jeep. my life is complete again... i have my friend back and she is running better than ever. minor issue (it may not be an issue though... i am ultimately decide that i like it) it has a new muffler. my dad bought it online... sometimes he isnt the smartest shopper... it is a racing muffler. i kid you not, this thing roars like you would not believe. as if the fact that i already listened to my music far to loud before... to compensate for the new roar, the stereo is at unheard of levels. yeah, i think i might love it.

who is better?

i am in ft. thomas kentucky... yes, i know... lame... i tell mae that all the time. she attempts to justify the fact that she lives in kentucky by saying that she lives so close to the 'nati that she may as well live in the 'nati. no, it is not the same... no matter how i is looked at... mae, you live in kentucky.

moving on... there is a current debate going on about blogs, and whose is better. i have been told by several people who are regular readers of my, mae, and lyndseys blogs that have said that my blog is by far the best. i am not sure what exactly being the best entails, but i have it. mae disagrees completely, and lyndsey isnt here to say anything at all. so, it is up to all of you out there. which one is better. mine, or maes. if you arent a reader of maes blog, then check it out at www.maeklingler.blogspot.com. then give a little comment. thank you for your imput.

what to do...

as most of you are well aware, i work at a factory. it is the type of place that involves me getting excessively dirty. the cause of this dirtiness, usually grease, oil, and coolant. i run a lathe... it uses ceramic tools to cut various types of steel, hense the grease, oil, and coolant. it is not fun (although, i did get in some good reading today... 2 rolling stones, 1 spin, and part of adventure... it was quality). exactly what i do and wether or not it is fun, is not the point. the point is... i always smell. every day, i go directly from work to my apartment, and the first thing i do is shower. i am not talking the fast 2 minute shower either... i scrub. regardless of the type of soap or the lengh of washing, nothing seems to work. i step out of the shower... seemingly clean... still smelling of a funky oil/coolant blend. i dont know what to do. i cannot stand it much longer. do any of you stinky ones out there have any advice for me?

i reign supreme

though this may not interest a great deal of you in the slightest bit, i have to give a shout out to my fellow present and former starbucks (and all other far inferior coffee shop) baristas out there. (if you have just been dumbfounded by the term 'barista,' stop reading now.) i sat down at this computer with the usual routine: sign onto aim, check the email, then examine the blogs of several of my favorite people, just before delving into my own profound thoughts and insights into life. always done in random order, i happened to check maes blog last, just before coming here. i must say, it was amusing, however it was wrong. i feel that it is my duty, as the far more experienced barista, to correct that infraction. specifically, i am speaking to mae, but all of you coffee makers out there should pay special attention.

ERROR: "Starbucks Rule #1: Please, never ever ever go into a Starbucks and order anything with "french vanilla." If you do that, we laugh at you after you leave. And we tell all of our high-brow friends about you. And laugh again. Just to be snobs. It's not like the Jolly Pirate."

oh my little starbucks barista... you have so much to learn. that whole thing about french vanilla... you could not be more wrong. inform all of your fellow partners that they are all asses for laughing at someone who possibly (although, in my experience, not likely) knew what they were ordering when they ordered their beverage with french vanilla. definition: a syrup flavor that is created by combining 1/2 vanilla and 1/2 hazelnut. oh yes, my friend, it is true! similar to how toffee nut used to be a flavor before it was actually bottled as "toffee nut." in all actuality, toffee nut is a bizarre blend of vanilla, caramel syrup, and hazelnut. yes, i know, bizarre.

mae, i love you, i know that might have been a bit harsh, but sometimes the truth hurts. this education will be for your own good in the long run, and just think of how impressed all of the partners are going to be when you walk in tomorrow with this new wealth of knowledge.

it may not have been such an important issue that i needed to make such a big deal about it, but i felt that i needed to reestablish my supremacy as that ultimate starbucks barista. oh yes, lyndsey, talya, mae, all of you out there, it will take years for you to reach the pinnacle that i sit on now.

a retraction

i was informed yesterday evening that the blog titled "lost and gone forever," overexagerated and made grevious errors. it is for that reason that today, i am writing a retraction. when i was talking about the over the rhine show that i was at saturday night, i slandered the name of my roommate and good friend sarah, in regard to her response to my wanting to go out with the band, rather than going home. the truth... david was going out with the band, but he wasnt so much interested in my going along with them. in my defense, a good story is always better when it is over exagerated, and i was really drunk at the time. it did seem to me, however briefly, that david was "all about me coming along." the fact of the matter, i was probably being so loud mouthed and obnoxious at the time that no one would have wanted to go out with me, especially the band that i had just payed money to see. sometimes i live in a bit of a fantasy world.

it is important that i set the record straight and that you all understand that sarah is amazing. she is one of the best friends ever, and if the band had really wanted me to come along, she would have been in full support of making my dreams come true. all of you blog readers out there, dont think less of her, think less of me. sarah, you are super, i love you, and thank you for not letting me drive drunk.

lost and gone forever

after the several requests of a posted picture, i suppose that i can do that. i just started a new roll of film though, so it isnt going to happen until after next weekend when i finish the roll. sorry, i know i suck, i am just not going to go to that much effort. patience is a virtue my friends.

over the rhine was in town last night, for their annual holiday show here in akron. it was good, not amazing, have definitely seen better, might even be incredibly disappointed about the whole thing. it would have been more enjoyable if mae-mae was with me, but the company was good and the beer was tasty. (they blended the black and tan in my black and tan though... that irritates me). we had people over at our apartment afterwards... that was a first... a rip-roaring good time.

sometimes, the inner workings of my roommates brain patterns throw me for a loop. it was 8 o'clock yesterday evening. we should have been walking out the door, so that we could get a decent spot in the midst of the sardined people occupying the lime spider. but no, she decided that she wanted to sweep and mop the floor. first it was just her room, so i didnt say anything... i dont so much care if she mops her room, and it wouldnt have taken long enough to really annoy me by our lateness. apparently, when sarah starts to clean, she just cant stop because before i knew it, i was sweeping the hallway, bathroom, and piano room so that she could "follow me with the mop." grr. we didnt get there until almost 9 o'clock, and let me just say, our placement in the can of sardines was not good!

mild irritation. maybe i am being silly, but i feel like i am waiting for her all the time. that bothers me. so after the show, we were all milling around, talking, finishing up our drinks (or buying more of them), and people were starting to get restless, so we gathered up to leave. i asked david if he was coming over, and he said, "no, i am going to go out with the band." you all know me, i started freaking out (i do like over the rhine quite a bit). he was all about me coming along too, so i pleadingly looked at my roommate (she was the dd, so where she went, i followed), and she simply said, "no, we cant, everyone is coming over." i was crushed. i begged her, like i have never begged before, and with no remorse whatsoever, she was unwilling to compromise. i am still crushed. i had the opportunity to hang out with one of my favorite bands of all time, and like it was nothing, the whole opportunity passed me by. crushed. sarah, my friend, i love you, but you will be paying for this decision for years. in fact, i may never get over it.

a warning...

apparently, i look different. i am not sure exactly what i look different than. i just look different. i encountered a certain individual (who will remain nameless) the other day, and they seemed shocked by how "different" i look. i am not sure why this caught me so off guard, but it did. it may be that i was thrown way off by the fact that the other person that was with this certain previously mentioned individual actually said, "whoa." when they saw me. i wish that i could have some light shed on this whole situation. i am left feeling quite... i dont know... strange.

to prevent this whole issue from happening again, i have decided to update all of you on my physical appearance. i understand that this may be quite unusual but try to work with me. my name is still colleen anne rankin. i am still 5'11" tall (although, it is a constant debate... i actually think that i am 6'). i still have green eyes.

some changes: i have hair! it is shoulder length. it is colored: the base is a bit lighter brown than my natural color and there are chunky blonde highlights mixed with lightening blonde highlights throughout. i straighten it every day (i know this is a big change for me, but i am trying to branch out in my styling skills). i didnt think that i was any skinnier than the usual, but i was informed by that certain individual that i have lost quite a bit of weight. this you will just have to judge for yourself... i have no further comments on the issue. now for the big shocker... i got my nose pierced. before you all freak out... dont... it is nice... a cute little diamond stud. really, trust me, my grandma even likes it.

i feel much better, now that i have gotten that all out there. sigh. what relief to know that i wont have to deal with such an unexpected stress again. i must also add... more important than all of that physical stuff... even though i may look a bit different, i am still me. i assure you, nothing on the inside has changed.

that is all. i have nothing left to say. except... mae... i think that you are super, and i love you!