friend.

i often times find myself wondering why i am not the friend that i wish i was. does that make sense? some days, i look at my relationships and think i am doing okay. i am actually succeeding at being the friend that i want myself to be and that my friends are happy with. then there are the days that i realize that it has been months since i have talked to certain people that i count as my closest friends. not only does this disappoint me because i am missing out on what those friendships give me, the better person that they encourage me to be, but more than anything, i am saddened because i am really letting you down.

i dont know what happens that my life becomes so important that i dont stop and make time for the people that i care about. i am sorry that i am such a sucky friend. i have hopes of one day being better at it, but i fear that i will always find myself in this place. so, friend, please know that regardless of what my actions tell you, my intentions are good. i just suck. regardless of that, i do love you and i am sure, appreciate you more than you know.