mae-mae

she is one of my favorites. as i sit here pondering what to write, the memories come rushing back, then i start laughing in the middle of the fairlawn library (and i wonder why so many people think that i am strange). mae and i have had some good times. she is one of those friends that you would spend your whole life looking for and be lucky if you ever found her. she is like a rock... you may wander all around in life, but just knowing that that rock will always be sitting where you left it, as stable and as unbreakable as ever... that is mae.

i am going to spend the rest of this post saying lots of nice things all about mae, so if you dont want to hear it, than i suggest that you stop reading now.

she always knows the best ways to challenge me. i feel like she looks at me and sees the good that i am not always able to find, than she lovingly points me towards that, even when she knows that i dont want to hear it or see it.

she is capable of being honest with me, about me, on a level that no other person has ever successfully been. i am not quite sure how, but she definately says stuff to me that no other person would get away with saying... at least not without a massive amount of screaming from my direction.

she loves me when i am uncapable of loving myself. on those days when i feel like things could not get worse, and i am feeling like i am unable to do anything right, mae is always there to encourage me.

mae has the ability to make me laugh possibly more than any one else i know. wether i am laughing with her or at her, there is never a dull moment.

i am never left wondering what mae is thinking or feeling. some people beat around the bush with their emotions... i never have to wonder if i am responding properly to her. if she wants to talk, i know it. if she wants me to listen, i know it. if she wants to be by herself, i know it.

when i need a friend, mae is always there. i am never left feeling judged or condemned. i know that i can probably say or do anything, but that will not change the way mae feels about me. she loves me and supports me through think and thin.

even when i am a shitty friend, mae is still there when i recover. when necesessary, she will call me out on it, even though the entire conversation may suck for both of it. really though, mae and i communicate on this whole different level. the other day, she called me and said... i need to talk to you about something and you need to not get mad at me. i took a breath, said okay, and she let it out. amazingly enough, we sat there and talked about it like two intelligent people. with most others, i would have been pissed, but i knew that mae was speaking out of love, so it was okay. i was challenged and it was hard... but i know that only a real friend would even stop and take the time to care.

i love listening to mae play and sing. seriously... i could sit for hours... it makes me feel so good inside. most of all, i love it when she plays her new songs for me... before anyone else gets to hear them... it makes me feel special. that girl has talent, amazing talent.

i can be myself... all the time. this may seem insignificant, but to have the ability to let all of my walls down... huge gift. even better, i feel like mae understands me. i have other friends who i can let me walls down around, but there is always a certain wondering of why i am the way that i am. mae never tells me that i should wear make-up when we go out, or that i should wear this shirt instead of the one that i have on. it is like she gets the inner workings of myself. i miss that.

mae appreciates my handiness. i used to be ashamed about this part of myself, then mae came along and compared me to macgyver... that is like the coolest thing to me.

when mae and i havent talked for a while, i know that i can call her up and there will be no strangeness. we dont have to do that whole catching up thing. it is almost as though we are still back in athens, sitting in our house, she is downstairs and i am upstairs. i love that.

she is always quick to forgive. mae accepts an appology better than almost anyone i know. the thing that i love though is that she doesnt just take it. she talks to you about it. when mae says that she forgives me, i know that it is true.

quality time with mae is like a walk outside on a sunny day. it just makes me feel so good about myself. there is nothing better than a good movie and a trip to the purple chop stix with mae-mae.

i think that i could go on like this for forever, so i am going to draw this to a close. the bottom line... mae, i love you. i miss you. you are one of the best friends that i will ever have and i wouldnt trade you in for anyone.